As a youth volleyball coach, I lay the foundation of mutual trust I also strive for as a parent. An accessible, supportive parent who is direct, trustworthy, listens openly, and models good behaviors, finds his/her children more receptive to parent’s guidance and direction, following family rules, and making better age-appropriate independent decisions. Once trust is established, effective and successful parental monitoring is as simple as knowing where your children are, who they are with and what they are doing (at all times). Our children do best when we express clear expectations of behaviors, provide them the skills needed to be true to themselves in challenging situations, insist on meeting their friends and their parents, and establish and model good behaviors and relationships. It?s proven that positive parental monitoring helps prevent young people from making unsafe choices, including underage drinking. — Katie Lucey, Parent and Founder of Novato Youth Volleyball
Where To Learn More
- Parental Monitoring (CDC)
- Monitoring Your Teen?s Activities: What Parents and Families Should Know (CDC)
- Parenting to Prevent Childhood Alcohol Use (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism)
What To Do
- Know your teen?s friends and their parents. Ask (and confirm) whether a responsible adult will be present when your teen is visiting a friend?s home.
- Talk with your teen about plans he/she has with friends and where they are going. Set clear expectations and understanding of when your teen will be home, and insist on expect a call/text if he/she will be late or if plans change in any way. Make sure your teen knows how to contact you at all times.
- Talk with your teen about your rules and expectations, explain the consequences for breaking the rules. If your teen does break a rule, enforce the consequences fairly and consistently. Teens will make mistakes and you will both learn.
- Ask other caring adults who know your teen to share what they observe about your teen?s behaviors, moods, or friends.
- Teach your teen how to avoid adverse situations. Let them know they can always call for a ride home. Tell your teen that he/she can always say ?You go ahead but there is no way I can — if my mom/dad were to find out, I would never be able to go out again.?